GTM’s Book of Customs, Traditions and Etiquette, Volume V: Decentralized Dining, Demystified

By [email protected] Through upheaval and social discord, the celestial orb traces its seasonal journey nonetheless.

Now, November wanes, slow-motion coups bed down for the winter, and temperatures have fallen like shares of ExxonMobil. The time has come to gather, as friends and family, and face the inevitable conversational challenges that arise in a time of great energy transition.

But lo, gather we must not, or maybe shouldn’t, or perhaps just a little, just as long as it’s outside. Virality is no longer just the gold standard of online journalism, but a thing with deleterious health consequences. Like the production of electricity, Thanksgiving must become

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